October 21
Scarred
but Not Forgotten
"The Lord has shown you what is good. He has told you what he requires of you. You must treat people fairly. You must love others faithfully. And you must be very careful to live the way your God wants you to."
Micah 6:8 (NIrV)
Kelly sat alone in her dimly lit apartment, staring at the flickering light of the television, though she wasn’t watching. The silence was heavy, pressing down on her like a weight she couldn’t lift. She hated the nights the most. It was when the memories crept in, uninvited and relentless. The nightmares always came, twisting her past into images she could never escape.
She had stopped believing in God a long time ago.
If God was real, He had ignored her cries when she was just a little girl, too young to understand why the hands meant to protect her had stolen her innocence. If He was good, He wouldn’t have let her suffer. She had prayed—oh, how she had prayed—until one day, she stopped. What was the point? God wasn’t listening. Or maybe He was never there to begin with.
The bitterness became her shield. She trusted no one, let no one in. The world had only taught her one lesson: people hurt, and God does nothing.
Tonight was no different. Another sleepless night. Another battle with the past.
But then something unexpected happened. As she scrolled mindlessly through her phone, her thumb hovered over a post from an old friend. It was just a Bible verse—Micah 6:8. She almost kept scrolling, but something made her stop.
"You must treat people fairly. You must love others faithfully. And you must be very careful to live the way your God wants you to."
She scoffed. Love others faithfully? Treat people fairly? Where was that justice when she needed it? Where was love when she was crying alone in the dark?
But as she read it again, something inside her shifted.
She had spent so long blaming God that she never thought about what He actually wanted for her. Did He want her to carry this pain alone? Did He want her heart to be filled with nothing but anger and fear?
For the first time in years, Kelly let herself ask the question she had buried deep inside—What if I’m wrong about God?
It was terrifying to even consider. But a small voice inside her whispered: What if He was there? What if He wept when you wept? What if He is still waiting for you to come back?
She didn’t know how to pray anymore. She didn’t even know if she could. But in the stillness of her empty apartment, she whispered, “God… if You’re real, if You ever cared… I don’t know how to do this. But I don’t want to feel this way anymore.”
The room remained quiet, but for the first time in years, her heart wasn’t.
A small seed of hope had been planted. And maybe—just maybe—she was ready to let it grow.
Prayer:
Father,
There is so much pain in this world, and sometimes it feels impossible to believe You are here in the midst of it.
I don’t understand why suffering happens, but I don’t want to live in anger anymore.
If You are real, if You truly see me, help me take the first step toward healing.
Soften my heart where it has been hardened by hurt.
Let me feel Your presence where I have only felt emptiness.
I don’t have all the answers, but I am willing to try.
In Jesus' name, Amen.
